My most hated game ever.

Today I will be speaking about my personal worst game ever. But first lets talk about something very close to me: Banjo Kazooie (this I don't hate). The game features an anthropomorphic Bear named Banjo and his faithful and rather rude companion Kazooie the bird who rides around in his blue backpack.  In the first game Banjo Kanzooie are just lying around while Gruntilda, the mean old witch on the mountain shaped like her head, tries to capture Banjo's sister to steal her beauty. In other words you have to stop this witch from becoming attractive. The plot wasn't all that important because the game itself was glorious and one of the most fun and entertaining games I've ever played. The game did something that all out of games didn't seem to be doing at the time be wacky, humorous and an entertaining adventure which is why I remember it fondly and if you haven't guessed by now that this is a retrospective then you are in for a shock.



Soak in the awesomeness.



So moving swiftly onwards to Banjo Tooie, yes it's a silly title but re-read the premise and the try complaining. So in this Gruntilda has been trapped under the boulder from which you trapped and has turned into a skeleton but is rescued by her sisters. During all this your cohort Bottles is killed and advises you a little while in spirit form. In this installment Gruntilda tries to suck the life force out of the kingdom of the jingos (don't ask) so they become zombies!!!! Thankfully though you have some help such as Jamjars (related to Bottles) , Mumbo Wumba and of course your various powers. Anyhow the game was a hit and expanded on many of  the features in  the game also adding in a skin for Kazooie which turned her into a fire-breathing dragon. The ending of the game was something that excited everyone the promise of Banjo Threeie!

But alas nothing can last forever and the good company Rare, they made Banjo Kazooie , was bought by microsoft and my hatred rose to new levels as we shall be discussing what happened next.

So this is what spawned form the twisted fusion of Rare and Microsoft,  this trash, This utter abomination that makes me puke. As I stare into the eyes of Banjo I know there is no hope for humanity until retribution for this is achieved. The main problem with this "game" is that it isn't a Banjo Kazooie game it is a game featuring Banjo and Kazooie. This crap DARES to call itself a Banjo Kazooie game well lets get started shall we. We open with Banjo being fat and a horder(large pile of xboxes and ice-cream tubs), oh Microsoft go to hell. So you're acosted by Gruntilda's head  and you must race but then this guy named L.O.G transprts you to a world you must build cars and race to get jiggys. So you get rid of all the interesting things you could do for building cars that each seem to obey their own version of the laws of physics. It's just so boring, nothing about it is new or really fun, games like this don't exist anymore for a reason! So you have to either bash something, race it or both, it is just so tedious. The levels actually are really interesting and look amazing making me think they were making a Banjo Threeie but were forced to change it. The most irritating thing about this though is the disappointment from this. I remember the joy on the way home that I could possible get a nostalgic feeling while also getting some new memories but then Rare decided to spit in my face. Anyway in this game Gruntilday is now a robot and I don't care. But now we move onto L.O.G who feels like Microsoft talking directly to us saying "Banjo Kazooie is gone  but now you get a newer better version, our version ". Liars! . So that is about it for my rant I'm done as this was also my last blog post so thanks for telerating my rage goodbye and thanks! 

One of my favourite games.

Now this will be a review of my personal favourite game ever and I will try not to let my love for this game blind me as I will admit that it is by no means the best game ever it is just my personal favourite. So lets start this totally bias review
Sonic was in1999 by Sega's sonic team for dreamcast. It of course stars Sonic the Hedgehog but in this game you can actually play as his cohorts such as Tails, Knuckles Amy E-102 gamma and bloody Big the Cat.
 The game opens with sonic noticing some SWAT members heading towards a building in town being a rather dimwitted fool sonic thinks he can help the people with guns and decides to see what the problem is. Turns out some horrible creature made out of something that looks like water is being shot at for no adequately explained reason. Sonic sees the bullets are having no effect and decides to take down the strange creature. After managing to defeat it it slinks away into the sewer like a coward. After all this Sonic decides to relax in the hotel when suddenly Tails crashes his bi-plane into the local beach so sonic must rescue him. Now from here on in the game begins to diverge into different perspectives of the story and I will cover each when I talk about gameplay. Anyway the main plot revolves around the water creature Chaos being controlled by Eggman/Doctor Robotnik who is feeding him the seven chaos emeralds to make him big and strong and Sonic plus his crew must stop him at all costs. During this each character is contacted by a mysterious character who helps explain the origin of chaos and how he came to be. This all leads to a climatic showdown in the end but more on that later.
 The gameplay varies from character to character so I will focus on the common elements such as upgrading in this game you can obtain upgrade for your powers that actually appear on the characters which I personally enjoyed but the overworld makes upgrading difficult as it either makes them a chore to find or makes it unnecessarily difficult such as when they change the camera angle suddenly in the middle of the goddamn puzzle making me restart it. Now as I mentioned the overworld can irritate me as the jungle is designed in such a way that if you don't have a map you will be lost for hours and I feel the game should a least give you a crude map so navigation is easier. The overworld does have some good qualities though such as the different music that plays in each area for example in the jungle you will hear pan flutes and drums which just adds to atmosphere. But personally I wish they had put a bit more effort into the overworld as it can be awkward to go from one area to the next.
 Time to take about the characters starting with Sonic his mechanics are pretty much the same as they have always been you run jump and spin although the unique and interesting levels make the difference and make the normally mundane controls interesting. Sonic also a few puzzles near the end of the game which come completely out of nowhere and are never seen in any other characters game. There is one major problem with Sonic though, the bad lip syncing and voice acting is really annoying and is bad for all except Gamma and Amy.
Tails' gameplay is almost the same as Sonic's only you must beat Sonic but where Sonic has speed you have flight. One of the best parts of Tails' story is his insecurity about whether he is useful without Sonic and how he overcomes this by the end. The only real problem with Tails is that it rehashes all of Sonic's levels only now with a time limit.
Knuckles is the dumbest characters in the game as he believes Eggman without question when he claims Sonic broke the Master Emerald which keeps his island afloat. Anyhow minor complaint aside knuckle's quest is to go into every level and retrieve the three pieces of the master emerald. Now Knuckles is a bit different to the others as he will punch and dig as well as glide (which makes an amazing sound) so he is one better to play if you're looking for something new.
Amy the creepy stalker of Sonic who follows him and is convinced he will someday marry her. Amy's levels mainly involving being chased by a robot who wants to capture your bird as he contains a chaos emerald. You mainly run and walk the robot with your hammer to slow him down these levels can be rather trick as it involves knowing the level really well.
E-102 Gamma has the best storyline in the game originally created by Eggman to capture the chaos emeralds. You start of just obeying Eggman blindly until you encounter Amy's bird and something within you changes you realise that you must hunt down your brothers and set the animals within them free. At the end of this you come up against E-101 and after defeating him you self-destruct in order to release the bird inside you which was the parent of Amy's bird. Gamma is completely different as he has a timer that ticks down and will only increase when you kill enemies with your right arm gun just awesome.
Bloody Big the Cat it's Sega bass fishing only the controls are even worse that is all.
   This game gets a solid 8/10 from me as I may love it but it does have some problems both mechanically and story wise but is utterly fantastic and creative.
Next post will be my most hated game of all time.